And it is with this belief and this knowledge that I say,

You are not enclosed within your bodies, nor confined to houses or fields.

That which is you dwells above the mountain and roves with the wind

It is not a thing that crawls into the sun for warmth or digs holes into darkness for safety,

But a thing free, a spirit that envelops the earth and moves in the ether.

 

/.../

 

This would I have you remember in remembering me:

That which seems most feeble and bewildered in you is the strongest and most determined.

Is it not your breath that has erected and hardened the structure of your bones?

And is it not a dream which none of you remember having dreamt, that builded your city and fashioned all there is in it?

Could you but see the tides of that breath you would cease to see all else,

And if you could hear the whispering of the dream you would hear no other sound.

 

But you do not see, nor do you hear, and it is well.

The veil that clouds your eyes shall be lifted by the hands that wove it,

And the clay that fills your ears thall be pierced by those fingers that kneaded it.

And you shall see

And you shall hear.

Yet you shall not deplore having known blindness, nor regret having been deaf.

For in that day you shall know the hidden purposes in all things,

And you shall bless darkness as you would bless light.

 

 

Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet (1923)

 

 

 

Had I told the sea

What I felt for you,

It would have left its shores,

Its shells,

Its fish,

And followed me.

 

 

I wondered if Abraham really had made a hash of life. Is to do what you want, to live under the conditions that please you, in peace with yourself, to make a hash of life; and is it success to be an eminent surgeon with ten thousand a year and a beautiful wife? I suppose it depends on what meaning you attach to life, the claim which you acknowledge to society, and the claim of the individual. But again I held my tongue, for who am I to argue with a knight?

 

I'm there, still, waiting, still.

There beneath the water's surface,

there above the mountain's peak.

I'm there, still, hoping, still.

There in the colors that bleed

through the leaves, there in the

blue that comes back before black does.

I'm there, still, come back to me.

 

Ideas from the North by Ameli Skoglund Blaser
Photography by Akina Arakaki

 

Det är svårt att balansera längtan efter att få resa och uppleva med längtan efter familj och vänner. Alltid vill jag åka någonstans, alltid vill jag se nytt. Sverige duger aldrig. Festerna suger, plugget suger, det svenska språket suger.

 

Sedan när en väl har hittat en ny spännande plats, ett nytt boende, ett nytt andrum suger Sverige plötsligt inte lika hemskt längre. Jag saknar makaroner, Friskis och Svettis, kollektivtrafik och allt det där jag aldrig ens tänkte på att jag skulle saknar. Men mest saknar jag min helt fantastiska familj. <33

 

Att flytta utomlands kräver planering. Jävligt mycket planering. Med planering kommer spänning och förväntan. En promenerar i framtida grannskapet genom Google Maps. En visualiserar sig själv i studentrummet med en hög med böcker framför sig: prov imorgon. Fan vad kul det ska bli! Jag lever drömmen!!!!!

Ja, för jag älskar att plugga. Framför allt på engelska. Och jag älskar att få luncha med en italienare, en spanjor, en amerikan, en dansk, en ryss, en japan. Det blir vardag.

 

Men ibland frågar en sig, vad fan håller jag på med? Varför utsätter jag mig själv för sån innerlig smärta varje gång jag flyttar tusentalshundra mil hemifrån?

 

Det är svårt att veta vart en hör hemma när en har utforskarblod i sig, när varje ny plats lämnar ett avtryck på själen. Som amerikanarna skulle säga, it is a bittersweet experience. Det är hemlängtan.

 

 

And I will continue to explore.